The Blended Life

Encouraging Multiracial Identity

Encouraging Multiracial Identity

Two things that are of utmost importance to me as a transracial adoptive parent are learning from adult adoptees and gathering tools for my child that encourage her identity. That's why when I read Sharon H. Chang's article "Why Mixed with White isn't White" over at...

Words

Words

  Words. I recall this saying, Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me. It was a lie. In the adoption world, especially in the transracial adoption world, words hurt. Intentional words meant to alienate, separate, and ‘other’ my family....

Participate

Participate

Yesterday my kindergartner came home after a discussion about Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. at school and had questions. I was busy making dinner, answering questions about homework requirements, checking in about tutoring sessions, and listening to voicemail – you know...

Waiting for Truth

Waiting for Truth

On December 9th I began drafting a response to the situation in Ferguson, to the denigration of black bodies, to the growing and needed conversation of race and racism in America, to the inevitable link between transracial adoption and racism. The conversation was on...

The Best Reads from NAM

The Best Reads from NAM

National Adoption Month is over. The month of November can so often be a mixed bag of emotion for adoptees and adoptive families. There seems to be an unending circle critiquing one another about being too positive, not real enough, too negative, sugar-coating, or...

The Truth in Your DNA

  Her words hit me in the gut. “Mom, I don’t care if it’s my birthday and Christmas presents for the next five years. The greatest gift I could ever receive is knowing who I am.” My daughter is talking about a DNA test. Over the summer we had hoped the state...

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Throwback Thursday: My Adoptive Parenting Top 10

November is National Adoption Month in which we remember the over 101,000 children waiting in foster care and hoping for placement with families. Every Thursday in November in honor of National Adoption Month I will host Throwback Thursday here at The Blended Life....

So Many Questions

Questions. Everyone seems to have questions. Questions about adoption, questions about being a multiracial family, questions about race, questions about why we adopted, when we adopted, how we adopted. There are times when I don’t mind and times that I’m tired of...

How To Talk About The Hard Things {Or Eleven-Year-Old Sages}

I am the official Spring Break Chauffeur or “SBC” as I am enjoying calling myself. If you're at my house you might even hear me announce, “The SBC says it’s time to depart.” {Somehow using a title gets my kids moving toward the van instead of my usual boring mom...

Everyday Bread

One of the biggest changes we made when we discovered our son was allergic to preservatives in our everyday food, was change our everyday bread. We could no longer purchase bread at the grocery store because of all the chemicals in each loaf, and the all natural...

The Blended Life Turns Two and a Giveaway!

Parents have long heard the saying, "Enjoy your little ones while you can because time flies!" I can now apply that saying to blog writing as well. Time has flown by and here I sit typing two years into blogging The Blended Life. This year held rapid reader growth and...

Its Time to Talk With Our Kids About Race

The number one question I have been asked in the last three days is “Are you talking with your kids about Trayvon Martin?” My resounding answer is YES. Where could I go that they would not see the image of Trayvon looking back at them? They wanted to know who he was...

Bereavement, Being Black, and Back to School

  The day of Michael Brown’s funeral I stood in the bereavement card aisle. My three children danced and swirled about me pulling open cards that loudly played “We Are the Champions” or “Celebration” as I stood frozen, hands sweaty, with a card that read ‘We lost...

Diversifying Your Shelves – Book Smitten

Book-smitten. A word I coined with my kids when we fall in love with a book. For me, that book must contribute to our bookshelf - in story, diversity, and beauty. The power of diversifying your bookshelf is found both in your children seeing themselves on the written...

Happenings on the Web

This week Adoptive Families Circle (AFC) is offering two fabulous Webinars that I wanted to pass on to Blended readers. Join these discussions and ask your questions or submit your questions to the experts before the Webinar for topical consideration. You must...

Sisterhood

Sisterhood. What a complex state of love and irritation those words hold in my household this summer! I have been sneaking around trying to capture THAT moment lately – the one full of tenderness and affection. A quiet moment of friendship and relaxed conversation...

Oh, The Blended Web…

With far too much happening on the web I curated a special list of articles and happenings just for Blended readers. Here's a list of what I'm reading and thinking about this week. This past fall my children were obsessed with Doc McStuffins. Obsessed. Last month...

The Best Reads from NAM

National Adoption Month is over. The month of November can so often be a mixed bag of emotion for adoptees and adoptive families. There seems to be an unending circle critiquing one another about being too positive, not real enough, too negative, sugar-coating, or...

Summer Tans and Free Time

Oh my – summer is finally here! Its only the third full week of summer, but it seems to be whizzing by at record speed. My family kicked it off with out of town visitors, Vacation Bible School, a trip to the beach, and constant SWIMMING!  And again this summer the...

Te Amo Mucho: On Birth Culture and Birth Language

Lately I have been thinking quite a bit about the power of gifting our children's birth language to them post adoption. This can be a dicey subject among adoptive parents and just so you know, I have landed firmly in the belief that parents of adoptees, whether...

A Transracially-Adopted Child’s Bill of Rights

Last week my daughter came home from middle school full of energy and with a look on her face that I recognized. She had connected with someone at school in a significant way. But you know tweens, I didn't want to push too hard, so I began guessing in my head just who...