The Blended Life

Encouraging Multiracial Identity

Encouraging Multiracial Identity

Two things that are of utmost importance to me as a transracial adoptive parent are learning from adult adoptees and gathering tools for my child that encourage her identity. That's why when I read Sharon H. Chang's article "Why Mixed with White isn't White" over at...

Words

Words

  Words. I recall this saying, Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me. It was a lie. In the adoption world, especially in the transracial adoption world, words hurt. Intentional words meant to alienate, separate, and ‘other’ my family....

Participate

Participate

Yesterday my kindergartner came home after a discussion about Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. at school and had questions. I was busy making dinner, answering questions about homework requirements, checking in about tutoring sessions, and listening to voicemail – you know...

Waiting for Truth

Waiting for Truth

On December 9th I began drafting a response to the situation in Ferguson, to the denigration of black bodies, to the growing and needed conversation of race and racism in America, to the inevitable link between transracial adoption and racism. The conversation was on...

The Best Reads from NAM

The Best Reads from NAM

National Adoption Month is over. The month of November can so often be a mixed bag of emotion for adoptees and adoptive families. There seems to be an unending circle critiquing one another about being too positive, not real enough, too negative, sugar-coating, or...

The Truth in Your DNA

  Her words hit me in the gut. “Mom, I don’t care if it’s my birthday and Christmas presents for the next five years. The greatest gift I could ever receive is knowing who I am.” My daughter is talking about a DNA test. Over the summer we had hoped the state...

Subscribe via Email

Happily Home Again

The Marina Bay Sands Resort - Singapore   Thank you Blended readers for all the well wishes for our trip to Singapore! My daughter and I are fully recovered from jet lag and ready for re-entry into summer. I have thought about what I appreciated most about being...

A Blended Approved Read – “Goose” by Molly Bang

My friend and Blended contributor Kurt emailed me recently about a video he stumbled across in his local library. The video is called Goose by Molly Bang and is narrated by Laura Dern. Originally a book, I quickly looked to see if it was in my library. Sadly it was...

On Not Being Enough

"I am not enough." I winced when I heard her say those four words. My stomach clenched and I felt bad for her - for me. Then, there it was again, she repeated herself as if maybe her audience could not - would not - digest it the first time. For a mother to say that...

The Transitioning Plate

The smell of bread baking is almost an everyday occurrence in our home. But to my children’s friends, it’s the smell of a magical world come to life! I laugh every time one of their friends says, “Your mom makes bread?!” I remember well the scents of my grandmother’s...

When Hair is Threatening

    Back in September my oldest daughter and I were listening to the news in the car when we heard about Tiana Parker. A seven-year-old excluded from school for lacking 'presentable' hair. We learned that little Ms. Parker's 'unpresentable hair' was dreads...

Oh, The Blended Web…

With far too much happening on the web I curated a special list of articles and happenings just for Blended readers. Here’s a list of what I’m reading and thinking about this week. Oh to live in L.A. The first ever *for credit* high school course about multiracial...

Dinners Around the World – April

Remember when I said that Dinners Around the World was a New Year’s Resolution goal for the new year? I am fully embracing my goal rhetoric because I find myself in mid-April with a family who has just recovered from a week of the stomach flu yet still delirious with...

Dinners Around the World – November

In 1986, at the very grown-up age of 14, I was proud to be chosen as part of the 4-H International Youth Exchange with Japan. For several weeks we lived with a family, learned about Japanese culture and then participated alongside our 4-H/Labo counterparts at camp. I...

Transnational Adoption and Third Culture Kids

I find great joy in the fact that Blended features perspectives and stories that don't often get heard in the adoption community. In this vein, I am happy to share this space today with my friend Glen Braden.  Glen, an adoptive dad, shares openly about how adoption...

Conversations at the Grocery Store

I saw her in the dairy aisle. I say ‘saw’ because I quickly recognized myself in the frazzled, tired, need-a-nap mom as she fielded questions from her two little ones on either side of her cart while still managing to select the correct milk. I recognized the me in...

Homemade Doughnuts

I have written before about my son's allergies to preservatives and dyes. It limits his diet considerably and to ensure his safety I make most everything we eat from scratch. However, at a recent party he saw something he couldn't get past - Doughnuts. There they were...

Oh, The Blended Web…

With far too much happening on the web I curated a special list of articles and happenings just for Blended readers. Here's a list of what I'm reading and thinking about this week. In honor of Martin Luther King, Jr.,  National Geographic Kids has a great set of...

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year! While December took me by storm, I have now resolved (thank you 2012) to get back to a regular writing schedule (hello blog, I've missed you). I hope you greeted 2012 with new hopes, new resolve, and new energy, as I have. And while December was busy I...

Diagnosing an Advanced Reader in 8 Easy Steps

I have a problem. Some say it’s a good problem, but it has become all consuming. Keeping my six-year-old in books. Teachers and instructors call these kids ‘Advanced Readers.’ Perhaps one lives at your house. Here are 8 easy signs that this kind of person resides at...

Hello 2013!

2012 will undoubtedly go down on the books as one of the most exciting yet difficult years of my life. I end it grateful for my family, for the precious gift of doing what I love, and for the readership here at this blog that is so close to my heart. Thank you readers...